Luis Molinar, CPC, MBA-IM

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The Importance and Aspects of an Apology

Have you ever done something or said something that was not impeccable and regretted it because you were inappropriate with your word and or action? Do you let it be, or do you feel that something needs to happen to change the energy in you and between them and you? An apology may be in order to clear that from your conscience and restore the relationship.

When one goes against the natural action of kindness toward humanity one needs to clear the air with the injured person as well as with one self.

Deep down inside, you know that something you said or did was not appropriate and you need to clear your conscience and your connection with them. You may need to give them an apology for what you said and/or did. Understand that giving an apology is one of the bravest things one can do for one’s self and for your continued connection to society and that person.

It takes strength and valor to be able to admit what you did wrong and ask for forgiveness. Giving an apology is not for the weak, but reserved only for the brave of heart. Never take an apology as a sign of weakness but one of strength in character, showing that the individual asking for the apology is strong, with unlimited values in place.

The first step in an apology is for the person to acknowledge and understand what they did or said that was wrong. The second step is to tell that person what they did that was incorrect. This step is imperative, because if the person just asks for an apology with out acknowledging what they did wrong, it’s not really an apology but only a shortcut in asking for forgiveness for their wrong.

Once the one that was infringed upon receives an apology they either will accept it or not, it will ultimately be their choice. But once the apology has been passed to the other, the person asking for the apology starts receiving gratification that he/she is correcting their behavior.

When the one receiving an apology accepts the apology they are saying that they acknowledge that the other will most likely not ever do that again, consequently, they can once again develop trust between them. If they choose not to accept the apology, which is their choice, they are saying that they are not open in trusting them any more, and the exchange will never take place.

An apology develops a new trust in any relationship and should never be considered “less than” but as a sign of strength and valor for the person asking for the apology. When the apology is accepted, those qualities are also received by the one asking for the apology, which in turn develops a deeper trust for themselves and the other.

So, next time you feel incomplete with someone, ask yourself if an apology is necessary, and if ever anyone apologizes to you for something said or done, be open in seeing the quality of that act of power by them and possibly you, if you choose to accept it.

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